Highjacked by Michael: My New Favorite Sport!
July 31, 2008 by devlinoneill
I have been a sports fan and played sports my entire life. From baseball to basketball. From American football to soccer – football, as everyone outside the United States calls it. From tennis to squash, racquetball and paddleball – no, really, paddleball is an actual sport with rules, leagues, tournaments and governing authorities. Boxing, track & field, golf and hockey. But after this weekend I have a new favorite spectator sport. No more wasting my time watching overpaid athletes, or excuses for athletes, with beer bellies and steroid enhanced bodies play games that I play for fun and enjoyment. Listening to grown men whine like babies when fans have the termerity to boo them because they don’t hustle for their multi-million dollar contracts.
My new favorite spectator sport is Professional Beach Volleyball, specifically Women’s Beach Volleyball. And I’m not alone as this is the fastest growing spectator sport in the world.
I have known about this sport and briefly seen it before, but this weekend I became hooked after watching the women’s final of the Long Beach Open, with the winner qualifying to represent the United States at the Summer Olympics in Beijing starting August 8. I witnessed stiff fierce competition among world-class athletes, teamwork and strategy to rival any professional football or baseball game and a passion not demonstrated by most of today’s athletes.
Now I know everybody is going to think I like this sport just because the women play in skimpy bikinis. Their tanned, oiled, well-toned bodies glistening in the California sun while they jiggle and bounce across the sand, giving each other congratulatory butt slaps. Ogling these cuties as they roll in the sand and then brush themselves and their teammate off.
Adjusting bikinis and pulling material out of crevices and resettling breasts that won’t stay in place. Yeah, I admit there’s that too.
Well, what do you expect? In what other sport does the camera purposely zoom in on a woman’s half-naked derrière as she flashes signals to her teammate?
And where else is advertising displayed on such curvaceous billboards?
Talk about eye-catching ads!
Even the bronzed skin of the players is used to advertise such companies as Hilton Hotels, Visa, Banana Boat, Gatorade and my personal favorites – Corona beer and Jose Cuervo tequila.
If I were in charge of advertising I would have the girls wear thongs – sorry, Devlin, money comes first – and sell premium space to spankos. Dr. Ken, wouldn’t it be great to have ‘Spanking Minnesota’ emblazoned across a hot Brazilian girl’s tushy? I would give you a good rate, but I would charge you extra to apply the temporary tattoo yourself. I’m sure you’ll be able to sweet talk the girl into letting you *tenderize* the advertising area for better adherence, so you’ll really get a bang for your buck. Calm down! That’s buck with a “B” Doc, don’t get too excited.
WOW! Brazilian girls are so spankable!
I also enjoyed the game’s announcers. One of them described a strong shot as “Kerri spanked it!” That’s Kerri Walsh the taller of the winning team of Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh. They are the reigning Olympic Women’s Beach Volleyball champions, and will be defending their title in Beijing. They are beach volleyball studs – studettes? – as they have won 102 straight matches.
And ladies, men also play beach volleyball, so you can picture yourself on the receiving end of a hot smash from this guy.
Or in the shower washing the sand off this fellow.
Hope you all like my new favorite sport. After Devlin’s post last month about indoor volleyball we ended up putting a team together of all the girls here on the blog. Since beach volleyball only requires two per team we can pair up the girls and form our own intramural league. Just keep cj and Kristina off the same team, that’s too much bratitude sparking together for the world to remain safe.
~Michael
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Nice choice of sport, Michael. I’ve played both beach and indoor volleyball and I know that moving around in all that sand is a lot more work. It’s like playing with a “handicap”. Someone I know said he thought female volleyball players had the best bottoms — from all the exercise no doubt. And of course, the costumes make a strong case for the “less is more” philosophy.
Yes, running in sand is one of the toughest workouts. My football couch in high school used to make us do that. Rocky Pope, one tough S.O.B. Even his name was tough.
Okay.
*FINE*.
See if I care.
I take one night off to attend a Going Away Party … and I come home to find I’ve been bumped out of my CEO, Executive Chief Chairman Visual Princess job?!! What the HECK? I was only gone for a few hours, Michael, and you whipped up THIS? Jeeze. You know you’ve just raised the bar a few feet, don’t you? How am I supposed to top this one?
It’s excellent. Excellent post and excellent pictures. All over excellent. You centered the photos and *everything.* Man, you’re GOOD.
xoxo
P.S. The football couch’s are tough! Way tougher than the football sofas or ottomans!
(LOL! I’d go in and correct your typo, Michael, if a little brat we know and love hadn’t made an issue of it. *G* )
But maybe he’ll take it easy on you, Princess, since you did say some nice things about his post, all completely true and verified by the evidence.
Great job, Michael! And I have GOT to get out to Huntington Beach before the season’s over.
-Dev
Michael,
Great post even though I believe Kristina and I would make a smashing team!!
cj
On my way home today see you from the Southeast this weekend!
Congratulations, Michael, I see Chross has listed your story of how you spanked your wife’s sister among his "spankings
of the week".
Yay, Michael! Although of course this means ANOTHER of your highjacks that gets more hits than my rambles. Harumph! *G*
And CJ, I have to believe your assertion to be true – you teamed with Kristina would be ‘smashing’ … windows, the patio furniture, my patience …
(Fly home safely and don’t brat the flight attendant even if he is cute. *G*)
-Dev
Thanks for the nice words, Gwen, and no, you’re not bumped out of anything, least of all your visual graphics post. I still need your help as only you can find those smokin’ hot spanking pictures. Belive me, I’ve looked but I can never discover the gold nuggets you always unearth. And as for setting the bar high, you and Dev have far surpassed this many times with your posts, and will continue to do so.
Oh, and smoothly done the way you praised me in one comment then brought me back down to earth in the next by oh so genteelly pointing out my typo. I hardly felt the knife enter at all.
Now, young lady, about that adolescent tone you adopted when you said:
“*FINE* See if I care.”
You know how pouty tantrums are dealt with around here, right? I’ll leave your Uncle D to handle this, as I am sure you’ll be summoned to his office very soon. I’ll leave a pillow at your desk. *G*
Thanks, Karl, thanks, Dev. That is cool about Chross.
cj, glad you liked the post. And I can’t add a thing to what Dev said about you and Kristina, and your *smashing* personalities. *G* Safe fight home.
“Safe fight home.”
Hey, Michael. Sigmund Freud called – he wants his slip back. *G*
Yeah, I’m having a rough couple of days. I hate when my slip shows.
“And I have GOT to get out to Huntington Beach before the season’s over.”
Thought I saw you on television at the match, D. The camera glimpsed a man in a trench coat and sunglasses skulking under the stands and I could have sworn it was you, especially since he was holding a box of tissues. Couldn’t see what he was doing with his other hand. *G*
Hey! Be nice or I won’t tell everybody we got 3513 hits today, a new one-day record.
“And CJ, I have to believe your assertion to be true – you teamed with Kristina would be ’smashing’ … windows, the patio furniture, my patience ”
Yeah Dev but that would be after we won on the sand!!
cj
“we got 3513 hits today”
Congratulations!!:)
cj
“Hey! Be nice or I won’t tell everybody we got 3513 hits today, a new one-day record.”
Me? D, I’m nice. I’m the sweetest guy around.
And the operative word in your statement above is “we” because none of this fun would be possible without you, Dev, Gwen and especially the wonderful readers and commentators. You are all very special people.
‘we got 3513 hits today’
3513 hits??? Okay, now I’m *certain* that Michael is the new EVP Graphics Princess, there’s no question. I’m going to relinquish my crown at midnight.
No. Wait. I always keep the jewelry. … Michael, the title is yours but I get to keep the bling, ok?
-
Of course you keep the bling, Gwen, as well as the job and the title. I was lucky is all. You are the true Princess.
Welcome, Ivana! Always good to hear new voices here, and I see you’ve made several comments to other items. Much appreciated!
And of course we’re all about democracy, and equal time, and fairness at this blog. (Oh hush, Gwen, I did too keep a straight face when I wrote that!)
-Dev
“Oh hush, Gwen, I did too keep a straight face when I wrote that!)”
Hey Gwen since the Prof only told you to hush I will say it for you… “SURE YOU DID?!”
cj
Welcome Ivana! Can always use more help around here keeping the tops fair!
cj
‘I will say it for you…’
Thanks CJ!
Yeah, Uncle D., what CJ said!
Can’t say that I approve of the cheeky way cj put it or of the way G so enthusiastically jumped into the impertinence pool with her – are you gals wearing string bikinis?- but, D, I think you WERE snickering a bit. *G*
Welcome, Ivana! So glad you found us, and that you appreciate the photos of the mimbos, er… men. I always take care of the needs of the women here on the blog.
“Can’t say that I approve of the cheeky way cj put it…”
Well at least you agree with the sentiment you know he was not “straight faced”.
Plus Michael would you expect anything else from me?
cj
cj, I agree that Devlin’s face was anything but straight when he uttered those words, and I wouldn’t expect anything except bratitude from you, but surely you know the Professor will be summoning you to his office soon for a lecture and *more.*
Yes Michael I seem to have a speed dial from him with a “CJ Office Now!” message pre-recorded.
cj
I detect a distressing lack of faith in my veracity here lately, from both sides of the gender divide, but I’ll go on record now as saying I can’t possibly ‘snicker’ with my tongue firmly planted in my cheek.
So there.
*G*
-Dev
“So there.”
Hmmm now I know if that came from one of us Girls we would be in soooooooooooooo much trouble…
hee hee
cj
‘tongue firmly planted’ (somewhere i am sure)
cheeky monkey!!
welcome Ivana!
cj – i think i was summoned to two offices this weekend – a new record!
Kristina,
Congratulations!! Maybe you can make it 3?
cj
lol -no i don’t think so, i am going to go back to being good for a while!
Ahhhhhhh ok Kristina *big sigh* Just out of curiosity what is your definition of “a while”?
cj
Or “good” for that matter. *G*
hahaha – by good i mean well behaved and polite manners of course (as i usually am!)
and a while….well….at least a few days, maybe a week or two???
it is possible!
“cheeky monkey!!”
Uh huh … “well behaved and polite …” (And just BTW, how many decades has it been since Mike Myers did that schtick on SNL? *G*)
Oh right, right! That brattish comment came BEFORE you saw the light, huh, Kristina? So these summonses to the office have been effective then? Who else has been calling you on the carpet? Or should I ask? Okay, I won’t.
But just remember to shun evil companions during this good-girl phase, such as one who would compare my perfectly mature ‘So there’ coda to her own girlish bratitude –
CJ! The very idea! (Hope you got home safely from your trip. And remember to set your alarm on Monday. 9 am. My office. Do NOT forget to wear panties. *G*)
Hugs to you both,
Dev
thx goodness for ESPN2.
“shun evil companions during this good-girl phase”
Ahhhhhh geeeeesssshhhh I would not pull Kristina into the under-brat-world if she does not want too. You know us brats of a code of honor also.
Prof. Dev would that be 9 am your time? That would fit my schedule better it would be my lunch break and that panties thing honest I would never report to you without them!
Respectfully “the evil companion”,
cj
lol – a brat code of honor! perfect!
ps – i have brazil-butt envy! i forgot to mention that earlier.
“i have brazil-butt envy!”
I kinda feel the same way about the six-packs the guys are sporting. Wonder if I can find one of those Abdominizer thingies they used to sell on TV.
And yes, CJ, I realize there is honor among brats, and I would have it no other way. Just remember that brats who friend together, bend together. (!)
-Dev
“…speed dial from him with a “CJ Office Now!” message pre-recorded.”
cj, you know besides speed dial Devlin also has a speed paddle. He keeps it in a quick-draw holster on his hip and can draw it quick as a whip – pun intended – and paddle naughty brats. Are there any other kind of brats? Very similar to the paddles the guards carry on their belts in his wonderful Sci-Fi novel ‘Corporal Idaho.’ He likes the holster and the whole gunfighter mystique, especially since he has roots in Texas. He also has that Clint Eastwood squint going for him. Just like Clint, you know you’re in deep trouble when D sears you with those laser beam eyes.
Kristina, cj, brat code of honor?! This sounds like trouble. Is that anything like Organized Crime’s ‘Omerta,’ the code of silence? Does that mean one will take the blame for the other instead of snitching? Sort of throw yourself on the spanking hand grenade to save your fellow brat.
And, Kristina, it does seem like you’re being called into a lot of offices this week, so to give your tushy a rest it is a sound idea if you try to be behave, tough as that may be. Plus, I would like to meet this fabled good girl you talk about. I think she may be more like the Loch Ness Monster or Big Foot; often rumored but never proven. *G*
Dave, so good to see you. Yeah, ESPN2 rocks! Don’t forget, football kicks off it’s exhibition season tonight with the Hall of Fame game. Regular season starts in about a month. WOO HOO!
“Just remember that brats who friend together, bend together.”
Yes Prof. Dev
cj
“Kristina, cj, brat code of honor?! This sounds like trouble.”
Now Michael why does a code of honor sound like trouble to you?
Hmmm I might have to purchase “Colorado Idaho” with a couple more of the maids series next! Except for one thing I got in trouble twice for reading Dev’s novels after curfew while I was in Germany. I tried to explain how good they were!
cj
It sounds like trouble, cj, because it involves you and Kristina. Anything involving that much bratitide can only lead to trouble.
‘Corporal Idaho’ is well worth the investment, cj, you’ll really enjoy it, and it’s quite a change from Dev’s ‘A Maid For All Seasons’ series, especially if you like Sci-Fi. Not surprised you got into trouble for breaking curfew, but if it wasn’t for that it would have been something else, this way you got to read D’s books. So it seems Lisa Carlson wasn’t the only one sporting a red ouchie bottom. *G*
Well you know I love Sci-fi so ‘Colorado Idaho’ will definitely be on the order form!
Now as to something else getting me in trouble while I was in Germany, you are right but Dev’s books were so good!!
cj
‘Colorado Idaho’
You can order that, cj, but it won’t be by Dev.
Ok you will have to forgive the typing today Michael.. ‘Corporal Idaho’ geeeessssshhhhh I will be more careful in the future
cj
Sorry Dev and Michael
‘Does that mean one will take the blame for the other instead of snitching?’
hmmm….from what i have observed, a brat code of honor may be a little different from a code of silence…
we give each other an alibi, laugh at each others toppy jokes, admire any new (hidden) shopping acquisitions and in general try and keep each other out of trouble…….in general….
but in our hearts we know what every brat wants, and sometimes she just needs a little help from a friend
michael – just because my ‘good girl’ is not always around, does not mean she does not exist!
*wink*
Kristina,
Very well said!! Cheers to the Brat Code!!
cj
Geez, I go away to Chicago for Crimson Moon’s Summer Spanktacular, and Michael puts up a killer post while I’m gone! That’s it–I can no longer go on vacation for fear of missing something here…..
Well done, Michael! Fantastic post and pictures…..
Dr. Ken
Welcome back, Dr Ken. Did you have a blast? How’s the hand?
“Ok you will have to forgive the typing today Michael.. ‘Corporal Idaho’ geeeessssshhhhh I will be more careful in the future”
cj, I’m not making fun of your typing. Believe me, I’m the very last person in the world who could do that as you’ve seen my numerous hypos, I mean typos, spread throughout the blog, all of which Gwen and Dev are all too happy to point out to the world. Just that Devlin has put his blood and sweat into his work and it’s a shame if the title is wrong. He and I know it wasn’t done purposely, but when you add a second state to the title I must tweak you a little by pointing it out.
Kristina, by revealing details of the brat code does that not violate it? What sort of punishment does that entail? And what are these “toppy jokes?” Like why did the Top cross the road? To spank the brat on the other side. Or, how many Tops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, one to hold the ladder steady from the vibrations caused by the second Top spanking the brat as she screws in the bulb. Lastly, as for the existence of ‘good girl’ Kristina, I guess it’s like Santa Claus, I must take it on faith. *G*
“Cheers to the Brat Code!!”
Yes, cj, cheers to the brat code. Three swats for you. No, let’s make that an even three dozen. *G*
Thanks for the nice words, Dr. Ken, but NEVER miss a CM party! Can’t wait to read about your adventures. And as Gwen says, you better ice down your hand, as well as some other parts of your anatomy.
Michael,
“Three swats for you. No, let’s make that an even three dozen. *G*”
I am thinking that there must be some type of ‘Top Math’ that 3 turns into 3 dozen.
“… by revealing details of the brat code does that not violate it?”
Nope Michael that is what is great about a brat code violations are expected!
As far as the ‘Top Jokes’ are concerned I believe that only us brats really appreciate such humor.
cj
Oh shoot I forgot…
Michael you were absolutely positively right in correcting my error on the title of Dev’s book! I definitely deserved the tweak!
I guess the jet lag caught up with me.
Dev my sincerest apologies for messing up your title not once but twice!
btw the title is “Corporal Idaho”
cj
Glad you like my calculus, cj. Along with the three dozen I’ll give you ONE pillow for afterwards.
DUH! I should have realized brat code violations are expected.
Yeah, jet lag sucks. Hope you’re all caught up now.
One pillow??
How generous lol
Yeah I am feeling much better today!
cj
One VERY fluffy pillow, cj, but if your tush is too sore to sit I could always stand you in the corner facing the wall. It wouldn’t be any trouble at all. No, really, it wouldn’t.
Glad you’re feeling better, though that only means more energy for you to channel into bratitude. *G*
lol – violations are key!
thanks cj!
i would tell some toppy jokes but I am being good….for now! *big kisses*
*gulp* Michael now that I think of it that One fluffy pillow would be very nice. Thank you for the generous offer of the corner time, but I think I will accept your first very gracious offer of the pillow. *wheeeeew I hate corner time*
“Glad you’re feeling better, though that only means more energy for you to channel into bratitude. *G*”
Thanks for the idea Michael…lol
You are very welcome Kristina!
I have to protect my “good for now” friend in Bratitude!
cj
So this is good girl Kristina I’ve heard so much about. Somehow I don’t think she’ll be sticking around too long. The temptations are just too great, and the results of bratitude so satisfying. *G*
Okay, cj, if you’re sure, but remember I always have a corner reserved just for you. A corner for Kristina too, once her good girl persona fades and she rejoins her partner in bratitude. *G*
“Okay, cj, if you’re sure, but remember I always have a corner reserved just for you.”
Thanks Michael but if it is all the same with you I would like to rent out that corner to other more needy folks. You know like a timeshare of sorts and I think that it will be so busy that I would not be able to use such a space.
cj
Geeze Louise! 67 comments. Well, 68 now. I think THAT’S a record.
What were we talking about? Oh yeah. CJ prefers feathery fundament soothers; Kristina is being a good girl (as if!); Dr. Ken is dangling his Crimson Moon memoirs like juicy carrots before us; and the Brat Code is alive and well, and living in a condo in Bayonne.
And oh yes – “Corporal Idaho.” How on EARTH did you come up with “Colorado Idaho,” CJ? I know everyone ‘back east’ considers all western states more or less the same – when I lived in Idaho everyone east of the Mississippi asked me how things were in Iowa – but that really IS too much …
Only not for the reason you think, CJ. Colorado figures significantly in the final chapter of “Corporal Idaho,” something you can’t have known when you made the error, since you’ve yet to read the book.
But just so you know, the “Corporal” in the title refers not only to corporal punishment, but is also a play on the “private Idaho” so many stressed out Californians dream of for some day, and also part of a song title, or so I’m told. And yeah, corporal is the rank just above private.
Anyway, no harm, no foul, apology accepted – so long as you put the book on your to-do list. You’ll like the hero. He’s Tom Paris as played by Humphrey Bogart’s rendition of Sam Spade channeling Devlin O’Neill. Deal with it.
And thanks for the plug, guys.*G*
-Dev
Gwen–The hand is fine. Why? What have you been up to, young lady?
I must admit, there was a moment during the very last spanking I gave that weekend where my arm felt a tad fatigued. I changed up the rhythm and that enabled me to end the session with some very satisfactory swats…
Michael–there were a few moments where I definitely kept my hand wrapped around a cold and well-iced soft drink. But why would I need ice applied anywhere else?
Dr. Ken
‘Gwen–The hand is fine. Why? What have you been up to, young lady?’
LOL, no need for suspicions, Dr. Ken, I was only asking because I know those parties are tough on the Spankers’ hands, that’s all. Just call me curious.
xoxo
“…the Brat Code is alive and well, and living in a condo in Bayonne.
”
Dev, I live in New Jersey and will venture to Bayonne to do battle with this brat code first hand instead of through its disciples cj and Kristina.
cj, no need for time sharing a corner, between Dev and I we have plenty of corners to go around. No brat will go without as long D and I are on God’s green earth. *G*
“…my hand wrapped around a cold and well-iced soft drink…”
Dr. Ken, you’re killing me with straight lines like this!
“Dev, I live in New Jersey and will venture to Bayonne to do battle with this brat code first hand instead of through its disciples cj and Kristina. ”
Kristina since Dev and Michael seem to be visiting Bayonne, how about we disciples launch our own attack here?
“No brat will go without as long D and I are on God’s green earth.”
Wheeeewwww I am safe since I am living in a drought area no green around here!
cj
I have no idea where Bayonne is, but as long as they are there – i agree that we should have fun here!
(very logical cj!)
ready for a top joke?? – you may have heard it …..
A Top (who shall remain unnamed) was driving home after a book signing and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. His car was covered with dents, so the next day he took it to a repair shop.
The brat shop owner saw that he was a Top, so she decided to have some fun. She told him just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.
So, the Top went home, got down on his hands and knees and started blowing into his tail pipe. Nothing happened. He blew a little harder, and still nothing happened. His brother, another (anonymous) Top, came over and said,
“What are you doing?”
The first Top told him how the repairbrat had instructed him to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. The brother rolled his eyes and said, “Uh, hello! You need to roll up the windows first.”
(hehehe)
Kristina ROFLMAO!!
That Kristina was one fantastic Top joke!!
Maybe next time it will be a dual exhaust car and they both need to blow!
cj
lol – thanks cj! this is one of my favourites!
Kristina,
Do you think it might be possible to get a hold of all of Michael and Dev’s leather sole shoes that they are so proud of and re-sew them back into their natural state as poor little Italian cows?
cj
if you can somehow gather the leather – i can sew them together!!
we may not be able to make an italian cow – but maybe we can make capes and masks!
No problem Kristina…
CJ sneaks in to Dev’s and Michael’s houses and gathers all the leather soles and delivers them to Kristina.
Here you go. Do you need any help?
[...] wear as little as possible. When the Brazilian women’s team plays, expect to see mainstream sports blogs everywhere go ga-ga with photos of the sextpots from [...]
LOL. Oh BOY. Check out #79.
An Olympics-related site linked to Michael’s post:
‘… And I could not determine the reason the men are not allowed to bare their torsos, while the women are required to wear as little as possible. When the Brazilian women’s team plays, expect to see *mainstream sports blogs* everywhere go ga-ga with photos of the sextpots from Rio.’
They’re calling us ‘a mainstream SPORTS BLOG’ now.
I’m telling, Michael! Uncle D. won’t be too pleased when he finds out you’ve turned us into a SPORTS blog!!
xoxo
Gwen thanks for the tip….very nice photos!
“I’m telling, Michael! Uncle D. won’t be too pleased when he finds out you’ve turned us into a SPORTS blog!!”
LOL seems Michael that Gwen is trying to get you in trouble. Now there is a switch.
cj
That’s just one of 6 or 8 ping backs we’ve had from sports news sites and blogs since Michael posted this, and really I don’t mind. I can’t think of any sport I’d rather be known for than Nearly Naked Girls’ Volleyball, except maybe Full Contact Nude Co-Ed Frisbee, with Spanking Penalties for Missed Catches and Poor Tosses by Girls.
And speaking of penalties, CJ and Kristina, burglary, especially of spanking implements, carries some fairly severe ones. As to that hail damage you mentioned, Kristina, I’m pretty sure my auto insurance will pay for repair by a REPUTABLE body shop. Does your medical policy cover 3rd degree paddle rash to your IMPERTINENT HEINIE?
-Dev
That is funny to get all those ping backs from sports news and blog sites. Would love to see their reactions to this blog.
Dev, when does “Full Contact Nude Co-Ed Frisbee, with Spanking Penalties for Missed Catches and Poor Tosses by Girls” season start?
“…seems Michael that Gwen is trying to get you in trouble. Now there is a switch.”
cj, I NEVER try to get Gwen into trouble. Just like you and Kristina, she takes care of that all on her own. Like today when Gwen told her Uncle D about us becoming a sports blog he didn’t mind, but I bet he will have a *talk* with her about how naughty it is for girls to tattle. An ouchy talk. *G*
Breaking and Entering, and to filch my prized shoe soles, no less! Very naughty, cj! Receiving stolen property and ruining my leather soles! VERY VERY naughty, Kristina! Dev and I want those leather soles returned IMMEDIATELY, and in pristine condition. You will both feel our wrath as we take turns using each sole on your impudent bare bottoms. Girls, don’t expect to be sitting too confortably for the next few days. *G*
Kristina, I don’t think that story was very funny. After I rolled up the windows I burned my lips on the tailpipe.
pssssssttt Kristina I am thinking Michael and Dev have returned from fighting the founders of our brat code. Apparently they did not do so well because they seem to be a tad bit irritable.
cj
cj, we never made the trip as we couldn’t be away and let you and Kristina run amok. You can see how well that turned out. Even a small amount of unsupervised time gets you both into a LARGE amount of trouble. Brats. *sigh*
Michael,
“Even a small amount of unsupervised time gets you both into a LARGE amount of trouble. Brats.”
Who us? I mean we were just doing a bit of spring cleaning for you and Dev and recycling for a greener earth.
cj
‘ a tad bit irritable’ – lol, i see that cj (ouchies!!)
my joke theoretically could have been about anyone!
sheesh
and michael….about your soles….. i kind of already made them into a batman cape….along with some of the straps cj brought me……
(backing slowly out the office door)
ps. i kind of like the mens diving outfits over the mens beach volleyball outfits…. oh my!
I’m not certain how I missed the Soled Batman Cape conversation earlier, but I did … and I just reread these comments … you girls are *very* funny. NAUGHTY – but *very funny*.
xoxo
lol – thanks gwen!
(i may have a few left over if you want a catwoman cape??)
Man, those Brazilian girls photos are amazing, aren’t they? Brazilian ladies are the best!
(Just trying to nudge the conversation back on-topic. Probably futile, I know….)
Dr. Ken
Gwen thank you for the compliment coming from you that means a lot… we were just trying to have a bit of fun lol
Dr. Ken,
“(Just trying to nudge the conversation back on-topic. Probably futile, I know….)”
Yep ‘Resistance is futile!’ when the brat code is in full force
cj
But one has to wonder, speaking of half-naked bottomed Brazilian ladies playing beach volleyball, if that’s where the blog “Sand In Your Panties” got its title.
Well SOMEbody has to wonder such things!
-Dev
Dev wrote:”But one has to wonder, speaking of half-naked bottomed Brazilian ladies playing beach volleyball, if that’s where the blog “Sand In Your Panties” got its title.
Well SOMEbody has to wonder such things!
-Dev”
Just keep thinkin, Butch. That’s what you’re good at…..
Dr. Ken
“…for a greener earth.”
cj, and for a redder bottom for you and Kristina. *G*
“…some of the straps cj brought me……”
Thanks for the use of the straps, Kristina, they will be used by Dev, Dr. Ken and I to give you and cj those redder bottoms I mentioned above. *G*
C’mon, Gwen, keep up. Kristina and cj need all the suport in bratitude they can get. *G*
Quite agree, Dr. Ken, we should get back on-TOPic of those Brazilian girls.
Yes, Dev, and no surprise that SOMEBODY was you wondering about sand in the Brazilian girl’s panties.
“Yes, Dev, and no surprise that SOMEBODY was you wondering about sand in the Brazilian girl’s panties.”
Now we all know that he was really wondering about the perfect way to spank all that sand out of the girl’s panties!
cj
cl, spanking is the ONLY way to remove sand from a girl’s panties. I find the best way is in the diaper positon with me holding her legs pointing towards her head with one hand while I swat her tush with the other hand. Of course her panties don’t stay on too long. *G*
Michael–not a big fan of the “diaper position”, but hey–if it gets the sand out……I’ll try it with the next Brazilian girl I see….
I probably should wait until I’m at an actual beach, I suppose…
Dr. Ken,
doing his best to help get this post to 100 comments…..
Ok, couldn’t resist…….this is 100………
Someonce call Guinness….or call for some Guinness (even better!)
Dr. Ken
100 comments, that is cool, Dr. Ken. Thanks for being the 100th, it’s an honor. Yes, let’s open some bottles of Guiness. BRILLIANT!
Good idea, Doc, about waiting to be on the beach before checking any Brazilian babe’s panties for sand. May stay out of trouble that way, and hopefully prison.
someone should get 100 smacks to commemorate this occasion…..
…hmmmmm…….now where did cj go??
(just kidding cj
)
OHHHHHHHHHHHHH thanks my pardner in brattitude!
The only reason I am upset is I did not think about doing that to you
LOL Brats Rule!
Cheers to the CODE
cj
Michael–very good point.
Brazilian women = Spankable Fun.
Brazilian Prison = Not.
-Dr. Ken
Wonderful idea, Kristina! Don’t worry, cj, since you were nominated by Kristina you will get the first 50 smacks, and to give proper due to such a great idea Kristina will get the next 50 smacks. Oh, what the hell, 100 smacks for you both, and before either of you say it, yes, that is Top math at its finest.
Yes, Dr. Ken, Brazilian Prison = Not, and a whole lot worse.
Cool and funny photos you’ve got there. Beach volleyball is one of the sports played in the Olympics too, well let’s see if the team USA can still grab a gold there.
Gold, shmold … we just want to see them grab each other’s buns. *G* Okay, okay, medals are good too.
Let’s see – 100 comments, 200 smacks, mutual brattish betrayal, Toppy math, deciphering the Brat Code, a real live comment from a vanilla sports site, and did someone mention Guinness? What’s next on this thread? Input from a Bratzilian … um … Brazilian prison warden?
-Dev
‘Input from a Bratzilian … um … Brazilian prison warden?’
Ummm, how about we go with a Seventh Day Adventist Brazillian minister? My girlfriend’s dad …
… No?
Hi Top Sports! Thanks very much for stopping by. I’m a big fan of Kerri & Misty – they’re both *fantastic*.
Like Gwen said, thanks for stopping by Top Sports. Is that Top Sports in that you are a Top who likes to play sports, maybe Topping the girls on the volleyball court.
Yes, Dev, this thread has had just about everything so let’s throw in a hot Brazilian prison warden from a women’s prison for the re-education of brats. Sounds like that could be a chapter in your next book.
“…a Seventh Day Adventist Brazillian minister?”
Do I even want to know, Gwen?
Michael wrote:”Yes, Dev, this thread has had just about everything so let’s throw in a hot Brazilian prison warden from a women’s prison for the re-education of brats. Sounds like that could be a chapter in your next book. ”
Or a new character for CORPORAL IDAHO 2….?
Dr. Ken
“Brazilian prison warden from a women’s prison for the re-education of brats.”
Hello Brat Code Union Steward!
We have a Top violation of our brat unity against all prison wardens. I would like to write a grievance please.
cj
The Grievance Forms (CP-451/OW) are where they’re always kept, CJ – on the shelf right in front of the spanking stocks in the Brat Regulation Center. The forms are within easy reach when you girls are secured in the stocks, but of course no sharp objects such as pens and pencils may be taken into the BRC, and the rules prohibit the removal of blank forms from the BRC.
I’m proud to say that during my tenure as Chief Brat Regulation Officer there has not been a single grievance filed, which I take as a great compliment to the fairness and efficiency of my staff, hard and unyielding as it … er … they may appear to you girls.
- CBRO O’Neill
Nice Catch-22 you have for handling grievances, CBRO O’Neill. Bet you received a bonus for coming up with that method. Better keep a sharp eye on cj, though, because if ever a brat could game the system it would be her, with an able assist from Kristina her cohort in bratitude, I’m sure. I’m still trying to figure out which is Robin to the other’s Batman, my guess is they take turns to keep us on our toes.
CORPORAL IDAHO 2 – Perfect, Dr. Ken! Hope you’re taking notes, Dev.
hmmm…i think we are more like thelma and louise….cj?
(cj- when you go to file your grievance, bring a new tube of lipstick!)
Thelma and Louise! Who is Geena Davis and who is Susan Sarandon? Stay away from any cliffs now, girls.
Thank you Kristina I was thinking crayons too..
However what I was able to do was hack into the computer and print my own grievance form out. I was also able to slip it into the lock box while the CBRO was primping in the mirror
Yep Thelma and Louise and boy do I love to drive fast!
Michael I am thinking if we did come across a cliff or two we would make it over to the other side.
cj
that’s right, because we would be driving a ferrari!!
Now you are talking Kristina! I love the way you think.
cj
Nice try, Thelma and Louise, but lipstick and crayons both are contraband in the BRC – more for the mess they make when subjected to excessive body heat produced by their carrier during discipline than any possible weapons use, as is the case with pens and pencils.
And Michael was right, gaming-the-system wise, though I’m sure he is aware of the EXTENSIVE body search that precedes a girl’s BRC session and wasn’t even concerned about this particular end-run around the rules.
But CJ … “primping in the mirror”? I’ll add a dozen with the holey paddle for that, in addition to your mandated 50 of the strap for unauthorized computer use. And by the way, we use Century Schoolbook font, not Garamond, in our forms production. I’ll be changing that to something else tonight. Just so you know.
-CBRO O’Neill
Looks like CBRO O’Neill has everything under control as usual, and the EXTENSIVE body search did slip my mind for a moment, but I’m sure that’s all cj and Kristina wil have on their minds now.
cj, a dozen stingers with the dreaded holey paddle on top of 50 with the strap! You better hope Kristina has enough arnica to go around. *G*
lol – i am not going anywhere near the CBRO!
but don’t worry cj – i have lots of arnica (and frozen peas)!
Kristina, I’m sure CBRO O’Neill will be coming to you.
Frozen peas! LOL Bet that’s a shock to the system! Do you have carrots to go with those peas?
(oops – I meant I am not going anywhere near the BRC, too many acronyms!)
lol – peas are better, you can put them in a tea towel if they are too cold!
“lol – peas are better, you can put them in a tea towel if they are too cold!”
Kristina, spoken like a true brat who has needed to sit on many a package of frozen peas in her time. Remind me on Monday morning to buy some stock in Birds Eye Frozen Food company.
Kristina is right about the peas!
Yes I do believe CBRO O’Neill has won this wizards chess match!
Hello Kristina, where are you? *rubbing bottom* I really need that arnica and the peas. Matter of fact you might need to get a few packages of peas cause my bum may cook the first few!
Lesson Learned ‘CBRO O’Neill does not primp in a mirror’…well that is at least what he says.
cj
“Kristina is right about the peas!”
I see cj is like her fellow brat Kristina and has lots of experience cooling a roasted bum with peas. Since they may be cooked due to the heat from your torched bottom the next time (and we all know there WILL be a next time) CBRO O’Neill should spank you with the peas on top of your tushy and this way you can have stir-fried veggies. *G*
Where are you Kristina? The brat code demands that you come to the aide of cj with arnica and frozen peas. Bet you’re out melting your credit card at the mall.
never fear cj – wonder-brat to the rescue! i picked up a family size package of peas at megalomart and brought the arnica cream i keep in the fridge!
lol – michael, i may have been at nordstorms looking at the purses and shoes….maybe….(no tax this weekend!!)
Thank you Wonder-Brat!!
cj
Peas? Bill Shakespeare would say ‘pease,’ as in:
Pease porridge hot,
Pease porridge cold,
Pease porridge on the bot,
Why does he have to scold?
(Expurgated lines from “The Taming of the Shrew.” Honest. *G*)
But CHILLED Arnica? Okay, I can see that, Kristina. Good thinking. And BTW, I discovered that Tiger Balm, warm or chilled, is a poor substitute, soothing a sore bum wise. I’m sure you can imagine why.
-Dev
Dev!
Tiger balm my gawd dang did you dislike the girl that much?
Thats why I carry my own arnica when I know I am in for it.
cj
“Tiger balm my gawd dang did you dislike the girl that much?”
Not at all, CJ, but I was young and inexperienced, and I quickly realized my mistake – who knew hot cinnamon hadn’t the same effect on a well spanked bottom as it did on my sore iron pumping arms? – and instantly switched to good old Jergen’s lotion. And watch your language, young lady. *G*
BTW, gracious of you to cede the chess game. As we all know, age and treachery will overcome youth and skill every time.
Oh and Kristina – does your Wonder Brat costume come with drop-seat tights? Just curious.
-Dev
‘drop-seat tights’
lol – no – it is a short red dress and cape with pink ruffled panties!
Awww … no drop-seat tights?
But I do like the pink ruffled panties – all the better to pull down and spank your Wonder Brat-ish bottom, my dear.
-Big Bad Dev
HOLEY PADDLES, Spankerman, it’s Wonder-Brat! Better warm up your arm as there will be lots of bratty bums to whack between her and her sidekick, Bratgirl! While Wonder-Brat has pink ruffled panties to pull down it is Bratgirl who wears the drop-seat tights, so it’s a Win-Win situation, Spankerman!
Your faithful companion, Red Hornet, for my sting leaves a girl’s tushy red and ouchie.